Dear Dr Fun,
I was after a bit of advice seeing as you’re a GP or summat.
Basically, my mate (Peg) has offered to ‘rip me a new arsehole’.
Now, as I’m a right fat c**t (with my weight (increasing)) I think a new arsehole could help reduce the pressure on my current one which must be close to being clapped out by now.
So, I was wondering if there was a British Standard in recommendations for sizes of bumholes?
And would you need planning permission?
Ton F**worth, Sunnybank S**thole
[Doctor Fun has chosen not to reply]